I’ve temped every day this month, mainly as reassurance that after my mammoth 66 day miscarriage-a-thon, my body has returned to normal.
And it has! So normal, in fact, that I got a triphasic chart on cycle day 23, even though I turned out to be not pregnant (not the first time that’s happened).
I shed a couple of tears over it, but nothing too drastic.
Then, out of the blue the other day, a lady called me about a study I registered interest in a few months back, looking at stress and anxiety in women suffering 3 or more miscarriages. Anyway, I’ve agreed to take part, if I should become pregnant again. Which I found a bit odd, like it was someone else who was nodding on the phone and saying Yes, I’m definitely interested.
I guess it kind of means I still have the intention of getting pregnant. Even after everything we’ve been through.
Having been at this for 27 months now, I have neither enthusiasm nor desperation left.
It just is.
So, that’s about where we are now. Waiting and wondering.
My youngest will soon give up his nappies, as he’s now using the toilet before bath time. It will be the first time I’ve been nappy free in almost 5 years.
But on the positive side, I have two children (not babies), who I can really talk to now.
I wish I could muster more enthusiasm for you, or for The Cause, but right now, I can’t.