That’s how I feel at the moment. Mentally, I’m fine. No problems, pretty content, feel pretty good about where I’m going and what I’m doing (even if it’s all a bit vague right now).
Bleurgh. I have horrible nausea this morning. I’m guessing this is a drop off in hormone levels after ovulation or something, but I think my hormones are just in total free fall this month for some reason. I’ve been very tired the last couple of weeks and I know my diet has been rubbish compared to what I usually try to eat.
What you eat is so important, and I know this, but I’m just struggling at the moment.
You know what it is?
I think it’s the fact that I am just waiting around for the end of TTC to pass. 6 weeks it should be, given that I just ovulated. Last night’s ’emergency’ BD (since I ovulated so early, we thought we had plenty of time) was a bit forced and I don’t think either of us really enjoyed it that much. Meh. I almost said let’s not bother!
Once I know I’m done, I think I’m going to be able to focus on other things without distraction.
I’m already thinking about how much space I’m going to free up in the loft once I get rid of the massive collection of baby things I’ve saved. And I’m thinking about finding a really decent holiday next year for the four of us, because it’ll be the first summer that we don’t have a newborn/tantrum-prone toddler to worry about. And I’m thinking about really focusing on myself and working on getting seriously fit and healthy, not just dabbling, which is what I feel I do at the moment.
But in the meantime I have a two week wait to sit through (during which I will not be taking my temperature) and then another whole horrible cycle after that.
Well, when I’m 80 and in a care home somewhere and no one ever visits me, at least I’ll be able to tell all my care-home buddies that I gave having 3 kids my absolute best shot.
Hey I might even write a book about it 😉
Right. Time for tea and chocolate.