Emotional Decluttering – A List of Things To Try

Well, I survived the weekend.


The one year anniversary of my miscarriage. The 2nd birthday of my beautiful boy. The socialising with family who drive me crazy, yet I still can’t help but love.

I am exhausted.


This has been the hardest week for me, mentally, in probably 10 years.

I feel as though I hit the bottom. I cried floods of tears. I yelled at my husband. I yelled at the kids. I sat with my head in my hands wondering how the hell to escape my own thoughts.

But now here we are. A new morning. A new start. All those milestones are gone now.

It’s time to start making myself happier.

Here are the things I have planned over the coming weeks and months, in no particular order:

  • Keep running (fitness and stress reduction)
  • See craniosacral therapist (let go of miscarriage)
  • Have stone massage therapy (stress reduction)
  • Daily meditation – at home and maybe join a course/class (stress reduction)
  • Reading list:Β The Power of Now, You Can Heal Your Life,Β The Emotionally Absent Mother (deal with emotional issues)
  • Try to be more mindful, spend time each day in the moment (stress reduction, emotional clutter)
  • Take turns with DH for 3-hour block of children-free time at weekends (stress reduction)
  • No alcohol (alcohol is a depressant)
  • Stop reading miscarriage/infertility forums (emotional clutter)
  • Stop mindless surfing online (emotional clutter)
  • Get hair cut short! (new start, no hiding behind my hair)
  • Cancel social engagements for next two months (stress reduction)
  • Record daily stress level (stress reduction: baseline and peak, each day, scale of 0-10)
  • Keep my house in order (calm clear environment)
  • Be a patient, happy mummy. Be present with my boys (happy boys = happy mummy)
  • Get the toilet, cupboard door, shelves and skirting board fixed upstairs (calm clear environment)
  • Take more time to look after myself and my appearance (care about my body)
  • Try not to spend all my time thinking about having a third baby (easier said than done)

Phew. I’ve already booked appointments here there and everywhere, and next week preschool starts again so I’ll have a little more free time – blogging and keeping up with the blogs I love has fallen by the wayside slightly over the summer.

I’ve been recording my stress levels for 6 days now and boy – I am WAY more uptight than I realised. I am literally in a state of permanent red-alert. Not sustainable and so bad for my body.

I did my first guided meditation last night and it immediately made me feel so much better. Just hoping I can fit everything in.

16 thoughts on “Emotional Decluttering – A List of Things To Try”

  1. you sound a lot like myself. I think your list sounds great but I just hope you don’t stress yourself out with your stress reduction “to do” list…I’ve done the same thing many times. Try to pick one really important one and just do that maybe? I let things pile up in my head and become clutter…for example, this weird pressure I put on myself to read each and every blog post of blogs I follow. Really quite ridiculous. Trying to ease up on those and the stress reduction activity i am solely focusing on is weekly yoga and it is helping. Good luck, you will get where you want to be because you are very self-aware. xo

  2. Wow – what a list! Your de-stress list is stressing me out just reading it. πŸ™‚ My [unsolicited] advice, Rose, would be not to stress over ensuring you are placing ticky marks next to each item on the list, and – rather – do what feels natural. Check in with yourself throughout your day. If what you’re doing at that moment is anxiety-inducing…stop doing that thing. You and I are a lot alike, I think. Type A, go-getters, always on a mission…list, list, list. When it comes to your health and well-being though, I wonder if it makes sense to break away from that standard modus operendi and spend more time feeling versus thinking?… Food for thought.

    p.s. Love the idea of cutting your hair off. I did it – and it changed everything for me. No more hair to hide behind and use as a security blanket. Go for it girl!

  3. I’ll try not to stress myself with my big list πŸ™‚ I deliberately haven’t put any times/deadlines on these things. They are just ideas for me to try over the coming weeks and months. I need a selection of different things up front so I can refer back if something isn’t working and try something else without reverting back to doing nothing. If trying to reduce stress starts to stress me out, I promise I’ll stop πŸ˜‰

  4. I came to your blog through Joshua. I want to recommend Natrol’s 5HTP for stress reduction, happier mood and better sleep. It has made a difference for me in a matter of days. Read the reviews on Amazon and see if you think it might help you. Take care! S

  5. Good luck! I’m glad, you survived the weekend. I was worried when I read that that recording your stress levels daily might turn out to be stressful but I know you’ll be on it if it is. Lots of support coming your way from down under πŸ™‚ X

  6. Hang in there. I have 4 beautiful kids, but suffered 5 miscarriages along the way. 2 before my first, and 2 after my first. So at one point I had 4 m/c and 1 baby. It seemed impossible. Doctors were not able to find any reason. Hope all will work out for you for the best, too.

    • Oh my goodness. What must you have thought at that point? I can’t imagine how people get through these things. So happy to hear you have 4 children – it really did all work out beautifully!

  7. I had an extremely emotional and stressful week myself (my husband was hospitalized). *HUGS* Miscarriage anniversaries are so hard. Somehow I never took note of the date of any of mine – thankfully!!

    • Oh my goodness. I hope he is ok?? Sometimes life just gets a bit bumpy and all we can do is hang on and hope for smoother roads ahead! I hope he is safe and well and back home with you all X

      • He is much better now. It was a tick bite turned sickness… πŸ™ So stinkin’ stressful, BUT he is home now and every day he’s improving some. πŸ˜€
        I definitely just hung on last week (and barely!)

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