Cervical Screening

I just couldn’t call this post “Smear Test”.

I really don’t like the way it sounds. Smear. Smeeeear. Like something mucky across a mirror.


Cervical screening sounds so much more civilised.

I had my test booked for this morning and since we have no one on hand to help us out with the boys, I took my 1 year old and my 3 year old with me.

I had visions of me lying on the bed, the nurse trying to get a sample and DS1 and DS2 running around the room emptying the drawers of syringes and wadding…

But actually, they were good as gold.

And my smear (that word again) was probably the easiest one I’ve ever had.

Afterwards the nurse said that there was some mucus on the sample that might mean that they had to repeat it in three months time. She even showed it to me.

I looked in the pot and wondered if what I was looking at was the 250 million sperm that DH delivered last night, or whether it was an abundance of egg white cervical fluid…

On the way out DS1 said to me

Mummy, did the nurse use the brush to make your bottom ok?

Yes, sweetie. My bottom is just fine now.

One day, he will make someone a very supportive husband 😉

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