I started spotting today.
Not much. I may have even missed it if I wasn’t checking religiously every time I went to the bathroom. The last couple of times (spanning 4 hours), there have been faint streaks of red. Hardly anything.
But enough for me to know this isn’t good.
I’ve miscarried at 6.5 weeks twice in the past, and on those occasions spotting started on day 33 and day 41, so I’m in the red zone as far as spotting goes.
However, for a fair comparison, I also spotted pretty much through the first 8 weeks of my good pregnancies.
So in actual fact, spotting tells me nothing.
I had a distinctive stretching feeling in my uterus last night at bedtime. I was lying in bed just absorbing the sensation and it wasn’t pain – it was actually a stretching feeling (if that makes any sense). I went to sleep certain that all was well.
And maybe it is – maybe (since I’ve always been prone to bleeding), it really is just my uterus accommodating the growing pregnancy sac.
But I’m also a serial miscarrier, so maybe it’s my body getting ready to get rid of what’s inside.
Probably because it isn’t chromosomally up to the job.
Where was I when I discovered this?
At a soft play centre with the boys.
And who did I bump into?
A friend from NCT classes, who I haven’t seen for around two years. She had a surprise 4 month old with her, born one week before she turned 40. She asked me if we were planning a third… I’d literally just got back from the bathroom where I’d discovered the bleeding…
I said we weren’t really committed either way.
So I’m feeling pretty emotionally guarded at the moment. Reactions have been postponed until more definitive information arrives.
Right now, I’d do pretty much anything for wine, chocolate, and pizza.
But I’ll save the indulgence for conclusive evidence of the end of pregnancy #9.